Stories of an Irregular Raccoon
by TweekTweak xD
Summary: A day-to-day recap of the life of Rigby Salyers.  P.O.V- Rigby.  Not good at descriptions xD
1. February 19th, 2011

Alright, first off, none of that 'Dear Diary' crap. It's just stupid. Secondly, I'm only writing in this stupid notebook because I want to look back on it when I get older, and see my rise to success. Makes sense, huh ?

Anyway, I guess I would have to tell you my biggest secret then, huh?

Well, I may as well.. Not like anyone's gonna be snooping through my stuff, or anything. Anyway, I think I'm depressed. Not like, 'I just lost my girlfriend', depressed. Like, the legitimate 'Suicide, cutting, hating myself' depression. I know, I should tell someone, but I don't think they can help. Noone else has been able to help me out with this. I was worse in high school, but all they did was put me on pills. They made me feel high, not happy. I guess everyone thinks those two things are the same thing. Oh, well.

Well, I'm glad, because Benson hasn't bugged me about getting back to work..

Just kidding, he told me to get working. Guess that means I have to go. Talk to you later!

_Fair Winds,_

_Rigby S._


	2. February 20th, 2011

February 20th, 2011

Sorry about that, I fell asleep right after work. Got my iPod cranked up, listening to MCR ! Whoo, Killjoys forever ! :D

I just thought of something.. I should give you a name, shouldn't I ? It needs to be something awesome, something cool, something I can remember. How about.. Well, first off, male or female ? Male, definitely male.. Age ? 23.

_**I GOT IT !**_

XAVIER !

It's cool, awesome, and I can remember it ! So now, you shall be Xavier.

Alright, Mordecai is bugging me about getting to work, so I have to go. Bye~ !

_Fair Winds,_

Rigby S.

February 20th, 2011

Xavier,

Dude, I have so much to tell you ! Soooo many exiting things happened today !

First off, Mordecai and I got promoted today ! Now, we get paid so much more, therefore, we get more video games ! Makes sense, right ?

Secondly, Mordecai hugged me today ! This may sound weird, but it was AMAZING ! He smelled like Dude-Time, and his feathers are soo soft !

…..Dude, I think I'm in love with my best friend..


	3. February 22nd, 2011

February 22nd, 2011

Xavier,

Sorry about not adding anything here yesterday. I had to think about a couple things, and I had no time to bother writing in this thing.

It's official. I'm in love with me best fiend, who happens to be a guy. Fucking wonderful. This is going to suck so much ass.

Well, anyway, over the past couple days, I've been thinking, and I think I should keep it a secret from everyone. I mean, who cares who I like, anyway ? It doesn't really matter, anyway.

Other than that, Mordecai has been a lot nicer to me..

I'm sorry, I'll stop talking about him…

…

He's just soo nice to me, and he knows just how to make me smile.. Which reminds me of a song I used to listen to a lot..

Ah, whatever. No time to dwell on it now. I have to get to forgetting about this stupid crush ! It's not even a crush, it's.. Puppy love ! Yeah, that's it ! Puppy love ! That makes amazing sense ! .. Actually, not at all, but whatever. Anyway, now I have to g eat something. I'm freaking starving !

_Fair Winds,_

_Rigby S._


	4. February 23rd, 2011

February 23rd, 2011

Xavier,

Dude, it's like, 1 in the morning right now. I cannot sleep for the life of me. Mordecai is sleeping next to me.. I just got the weirdest urge to go & hug him… This is freaking killing me… Seriously, it's freaking eating me from the inside out. I fall more in love with him every passing minute… I'm going to try to sleep. I'll update later, if I can.

_Fair Winds [for now],_

_Rigby S._

February 23rd, 2011

Xavier,

Alright, I told Skips today that I liked Mordecai. He took it a lot better than I thought. I thought that he was gonna go all 'Yeti mother fucker' on my ass. Well, at least I know that Brokencyde will always be here for me. Skeet Skeet, to be specific. Anyway, I should get back to work. Talk to you later !

_Fair Winds,_

_Rigby S._

February 23rd, 2011

Xavier,

I really wish I could write more right now, but I have to get back to work in a couple minutes. Mordecai found out, somehow, and he's not talking to me anymore ! He hasn't said a word to me since this morning. Last thing he said to me, he told me the song I was thinking of was "You Make Me Smile", by Uncle Kracker… Oh, God… I think he found the notebook ! I'm screwed !

A.N. : Sorry about the shitty update today, I'm really tired, and I kinda have to rush. Anyway, R&&R !


	5. Pandemic

February 24th, 2011

Xavier,

no, no, no, No ! This is all wrong ! I should have never written anything in this stupid notebook ! Xavier, I don't know about you, but…

Shit, dude, I'm talking to a fucking notebook now ! I really have gone insane !

Anyway, me and Mordecai's pay has really _paid_ off ! Ha-ha ! Get it !

Well, now we have to get back, so I'll check you later ! Bye !

_ Fair Winds,_

_ Rigby S._

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*pagebreakxD~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~MxR~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_**Rigby:**_

_`Dude, this is Mordecai writing. I know that, wherever you are, you don't have your notebook, but I you come back for it, I just needed to tell you something. I've been thinking some things over, and I really do love you, dude. Please, if you do come back, stay. With me. For me, I'm begging you, dude ! I can't survive without you, man !_

_Alright… I need to get back to work, or I'll get busted. I guess, if you do come back, I'll me seeing you around ? I miss you. Please stay._

_~Mordecai _


	6. Missing, Part 1

Alright, this isn't Rigby, this is Mordecai. Rigby has left, and we don't know where he went. Until he turns up, I'm going to be writing in his journal, telling you the status of what we know, and when [if] we find him. I'm just so worried, I actually feel sick. I read this thing, and I found out he had a crush on me. I had a crush on him since we were kids, I was just afraid that he would reject me for what I am… Gay, is the word ? I'm not sure, but all I know at this point, is that the last time anyone saw him, he was at the coffee shop. This has never happened before, I have no idea why he would just run off, and not tell anyone where he went. It just isn't like Rigby.

It crushed me to have to go through his side of the room, but it had to be done. All I found of importance was an old piece of paper, and some music tapes. But what really scared me was what was on the paper. I'll put it in this notebook, for whoever reads this next.

Please, whoever finds this next, if you know where he is, his name is Rigby Salyers, he's about 4 feet, and he's a raccoon, call this number- 315-555-5939

I'll leave it on the park bench. If you can help, write what you know, and put it back. If you don't, leave this alone !

~Mordecai Quintel.

P.S. He looks kind of like he has a mullet. Thank you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~MxR~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A.N. Don't any of you dare call that number, I'm not sure if it's real or not xD Anyway, this is the Missing series, starting with the last chapter. Sorry for it not being very good, I haven't been very inspired… [:

KayThanksBye

A.N. #2: Alright, so this is going to last for about 3 or 4 chapters, not sure. But, I promise the next one will be longer, and much better written xD

KayThanksBye


	7. Missing, Part 2

March 28th, 2011

Still missing. Nobody has seen or heard the little guy. I think something serious might have actually happened to him. Most of the time when he gets pissed off or sad, he just kind of stalks off for a couple hours, then comes home, and forgets all about it. But I think it's different this time.. What if.. What if he's hurt ? What if he hurt himself ? Oh, God, I would not be able to live with myself if something bad ever happened to Rig-Bone. He's my life; my everything. I legitimately cannot imagine my life without the little stinker.

I have to go. Someone is at the door, asking for Rigby. Oh, sweet Jesus, it's Don. What the hell am I gonna say !

~Mordecai Q.

A.N.: I am soooo sorry for the late chapter. Too much shit going on in my life ! AH!

Anyway, I'm gonna have a new story for South Park up soon called "Zombies Everywhere".

You should check it out when it comes out!

Alright, I'm gonna stop bothering you.

KayThanksBye


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